After much prayer and observation, I gathered that the Lord has three lessons that he specifically wants me to learn during this season of my life. I named this season as 'Be HER' season. (I know, it sounds feminine)
The Lord wants me to learn to be:
H for humble
Key verse: "Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." (Matt 11:29)
Comment: My fragile emotions are easily affected by the perception of others. A word of praise can make my day, but a word of criticism can cause me to feel wounded, angry and discouraged for some time. I need to take pride down from its throne, and learn to be humble at heart. Like Jesus, I need to say "It's OK!" when others perceive me negatively, because at the end of the day, what matters most is to please God and gain his favour! Nothing else matters.
E for evangelistic
Key verse: "But if I say, "I will not mention him or speak any more in his name," his word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot."(Jer 20:9)
Comment: I tend to fear man more than God. The fear of rejection and mockery from others often rob me of the courage to proclaim God's love and salvation to them. Recently, thank God that he has been doing many amazing work in me. He has given me the passion for the salvation of others that compelled me to share the Gospel to people around me. As a result, I had the privilege of being used by God to lead many into his kingdom. Hey, it is not as difficult as I thought in the first place! The more I do, the easier it becomes, the more confident I become! I still fear man occasionally, but I am improving. Just like Jeremiah, I pray that God's Word will be in my heart like a fire...and I will be weary of holding it in! What am I still waiting for? Spread the seeds of the Gospel NOW!
R for relaxed
Key verse: Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? (Matt 6:27)
Comment: I must admit, perfectionism runs in my blood, although the degree of it varies in various seasons. When there is something that I need to do, I must do it NOW. I will feel restless until I have completed the task. And when I do that something, I must do it to the best I can, if not, I will feel bad about it. Even when I was young, I already had it in me. For example, when I was in primary school, when I was given a stack of weekend homework for me to do during the weekends, I would start doing it the moment I entered house after school, and I will finish it before I have my dinner. Homework that was supposed to be spread out nicely for the weekend, but I gobbled it up in a few hours time. Now that I have become a pastor, you can see the imminent danger that is lurking around all the time. As a pastor, there is always work to do, needs to attend to, things in church and ministry you want to improve on. Thus, if I am not careful, I can always remain in a state of stress and intensity. If this goes on, my health will deteriorate fast. Thus, in this season, God is teaching me to learn to relax. It is OK to leave the work and need aside and enjoy time with my loved ones, enjoy time even with myself. I need to learn not to worry, as I always tell others, "Worry is an insult to God."
May God help me as I embark on mastering these three things: Humble, Evangelistic and Relaxed! Remember me in your prayers! :)